Lauren's Nightmare

WARNING: contains pregnancy, growth, and ripping clothes

Lauren winced as she took off her bra and sighed once she was free of it. She made a mental note to go out the next day and by a maternity bra- her breasts were steadily growing already in her 19th week of her pregnancy. They were already heavier than she was used to, and just big enough to make her old B cup bras feel uncomfortable. It was to the point where she was ready to renounce bras all together, but some instinct in her warned that she may not feel that way in the later months to come, so she would keep wearing them.

She slipped her arms into her favorite pajama tee shirt and maneuvered it over her head. Soon, she wouldn't be able to wear this either, but she was determined that she would until her body literally forced her to buy something bigger.

Part of that was the fact that it hugged her body. It always had, but now it was even tighter, showing every new curve each new day brought. Not that she was very curvy yet, at least in terms of a pregnant woman, but her bulge was noticeable, especially to her friends and family. Even people at work were starting to comment that she was starting to actually look sort of pregnant, which was a nice way of saying she was starting to look fat.

This pregnancy was actually a blessing to Lauren. Her weight had always been a concern-she was just too thin, barely more than skin and bones. It didn't matter what she'd eaten or how much; her weight had always hovered just within 100- 110 pounds, almost twenty pounds under where a woman her age and height should be. It was tiring to constantly explain that she wasn't anorexic or bulimic, that she didn't have cancer or some sort of wasting disease, and she was also tired of that worried look her doctor had given her over the years.

Her doctor had continued to give her worried looks until she hit her 12th week or so. Finally, her body seemed to think fat was worth holding onto. She was still slender, and not gaining the normal amount of weight that a girl of her body type and stage of pregnancy would, but both of them were encouraged by the steady increase in the numbers.

More recently though, Lauren had another fear about her weight. She had officially entered her second trimester, but she hadn't felt the baby move. Her doctor had assured her that many women felt their first quickening later in their fourth or even fifth month, but Lauren was still afraid. What if the baby was too weak to move because she wasn't getting enough nourishment for it? What if she never felt it move because her skinny body had a miscarriage?

She thought about it so much that she was sure it wasn't healthy. It made her skin crawl and feel clammy, sometimes she got goose bumps and sometimes she wanted to cry uncontrollably. She was so afraid of losing this baby- they had tried three times before this and it had all ended in miscarriages.

Although her panic attacks were getting more intense, they were also getting shorter and shorter. Now they only lasted a few minutes, and only if she was alone and not distracted. She took a few deep breaths, willing her heart to stop racing and her hands, now cupped on her slightly swollen belly, to stop shaking. She made her way to the kitchen to pour herself a glass of milk, gulping it down. Milk was a sort of comfort to her, every since she had been little. She never went to bed without a glass of it before-hand.

Lauren put the glass in the sink and silently made her way back to the bedroom, shutting off the lights as she went. She felt exhausted. It was time for bed. She eased herself under the covers, leaning over to shut off the light before finally snuggling up against her pillow.

Something woke her up hours later. She glanced at the clock-four a.m. With a frown, she sat up to look about the room. As she did, she felt her abdomen tighten, halting her from sitting up all the way. It was blocked by something!

She hastily threw the covers off, only to find nothing but her own belly beneath the sheets. Nothing was blocking it; it was blocking itself! It had grown! She looked like she had put on two months of growth in the six hours she'd been asleep!

Lauren placed both hands on her belly, worried and shocked. What the hell was going on? As not normal as her pregnancy already was, this was way worse!

There was a build-up of pressure, so much that she couldn't help but gasp. It almost felt like she had to pee but it was further up, deeper in her belly. It got worse and worse until all of a sudden her belly surged outwards, going from six to seven months pregnant. Her tee shirt, already strained by her new girth, creaked ominously.

Lauren laid back, panting a little. She felt drained again, and her body broke out into a sweat. Her mind was racing- this was impossible! It wasn't happening! Not happening! It was not possible!

The pressure built again. Lauren's hands left her belly and grabbed the sheets on either side of her. The pressure was worse than the first time, not necessarily painful, but she felt like she was filling up. The pressure burst again and her belly grew even more, moving past third trimester and into overdue. Her shirt, somehow holding up past its limits, creaked again. Lauren watched as her belly button popped in slow motion, standing out stiff beneath the cotton fabric.

Drained again, Lauren leaned back against the pillows. She raised a hand to her forehead and realized that her hair was wet and clinging to her skin. With a groan, she sat up and slowly swung her legs over the side of the bed. She willed herself to stand, and spent a moment trying to find her balance. Her belly was heavy and more than anything, she wanted to sit back down. It jerked and twitched in her hands- the baby inside was kicking up a storm, just a disturbed as she was by its unnatural growth.

Lauren tried to make her way to the bedroom door (she had stupidly left her cell phone in the kitchen) but only succeeded getting to the doorway of the bathroom that connected to her room before the pressure started to build again. She cried out as it built, getting worse and worse until finally reaching its peak again. Her belly went from overdue to overfull in her hands.

She couldn't stand anymore. Lauren took two unsteady steps into the bathroom and used the wall to gently lower herself to the ground. Inside her womb, the baby wriggled and kicked even more strongly than before. It was so intense that she stared at it for a few moments. There were times she almost felt like the baby was in two places at once, kicking near her left hip and just below her navel at the same time. As she watched, she realized that her shirt had a tear in it, one big enough to let her belly button peak through.

For the next half hour, Lauren endured at least five more periods of pressure and growth. The first had split her shirt even wider down the middle; the second had finally caused the hem to tear clean through, leaving her belly unhindered. The next three growths were even bigger than the others, causing her to look months and months overdue. She looked like she had swallowed a rather large man whole, and it felt like there was one moving in her too.

One slippery arm lay draped in the space between her belly and her chest, her other was lying limp on the floor. Her hand was clenched in the bathmat so tightly that she was sure that she would need help letting go of it. Her legs were splayed out somewhere in front of her, but she couldn't see them at all.

Another bout of pressure built in her, but she was too tired to even grit her teeth. Lauren could only close her eyes and moan softly as her belly surged out another foot. She opened them in time to see what could be an elbow or foot make a distinctive new nub against her skin before sliding back in.

It was followed almost immediately by another build up, but it felt different from the others. Lauren moaned again, now there was pain. Her belly didn't grow again though. When the pressure and pain finally burst within her, she felt it all direct itself downwards this time. This time she actually heard a soft pop and then she felt a gush down in between her legs. Her whole bottom half was soaked instantly; her water had broken.

Her belly went from being round and smooth to lopsided and lumpy. Not only could she now feel and see the movements within her, she could now see the outline of the contents of her womb. There were at least eight baby sized lumps all writhing beneath her skin, pressing hands and feet against her skin. And those were only the ones situated near her skin.

***

Lauren sat up with a start, back in her own bed. The first thing she did was look down- her belly was back to its normal size, 19 weeks, still small and slightly pudgy. There was an arm draped over it and Lauren looked over to see that Trish had finally gotten home. Her partner had had a night shift at the hospital and had warned her that she would not be back in time for Lauren's normal bedtime.

She looked over at the clock. It was 4:13 a.m.

With a relieved sigh, she laid back against the pillows. She was still shaky and a bit clammy from her nightmare, but the feeling was slowly going away. She looked back again at the woman sleeping next to her. Poor Trish, she was so tired that Lauren hadn't woken her up.

It was strange, but Lauren felt strangely calm and at ease now, and she realized that somehow her nightmare had somehow gotten rid of her fears. She hadn't felt like this since before they had started trying to conceive. The anxiety had built and built with each failed attempt, each miscarriage. Trish's reaction had only served to make it worse- her body had been the one to reject all those fetuses before they had finally been desperate enough to try Lauren's, despite her weight problems.

The nightmare had been about the very opposite thing that Lauren had been afraid of, and yet it had helped her.

She eased herself closer to Trish, and her partner wrapped her arm even tighter around her protectively without waking. Lauren smiled as she closed her eyes. Let Trish worry about it from now on.

Just before she drifted off to sleep, Lauren felt a faint bubbly feeling in her belly. Like butterflies.